7?
I took a few weeks off from writing and worked on a wedding gift for a friend and to maybe clear my head of this incredible fog I have been in. I must say that the wedding gift turned out very nice and I am quite proud of it but unfortunately, my head is still in a fog and has been for a while. I am not sure how it got so foggy and lethargic but there is no denying that it is there.
How does one get out of a mood, funk, or fog? I’m sure there are a thousand other names for the mood that one gets into when you just don’t seem to be overly interested in anything? I’m sure I will get one or two reply’s that will be well intended that will instruct me to go for a long walk, smell some flowers, enjoy a painting, read a book with a nice glass of wine or binge watch a show with a six pack of locally brewed beer. These are all good suggestions but I seriously struggle with all of those and just about any other suggestions that will come along
First off, I can’t just walk, I am too competitive, it is inevitable that what begins as a leisurely walk to enjoy the surroundings, complete with a few scheduled harmonizing stops to sniff some flowers that I can’t name, ends up being a journey that requires me to “pick up the pace” and get moving. Heaven forbid someone pass me on the trail because to me, that is considered public shaming and cannot be tolerated in any form. Before I have even sniffed the first Chrysanthemum, which I often confuse with the equally beautiful Dandelion, I am at a jog, then a run and then I am looking at my watch to see if I am beating my last mile time.
Don’t get me wrong, flowers are beautiful. I’ve seen some of the most beautiful flowers ever made, I couldn’t tell you what they were or how they smell because I don’t like to linger too long because flowers attract bees and my tolerance for pain is not very good so I lean towards the quick appreciative glance and prefer to just keep moving.
Paintings are confusing to me, I’m sure they took a lot of time and effort for the artist. The colors, the thought, the precision of their deepest thoughts all transferred to canvas are all obviously enjoyable. But even if I look at the most famous painting of all, The Mona Lisa, I don’t get excited. Maybe if I went to see the ole gal in person, I might feel differently but as for now, nope. Even those sand paintings where you have to find the hidden object can be beautiful. Despite the fact that I can never find the hidden object doesn’t make them any less pretty.
I used to have a serious appetite for reading but somehow, I managed to turn that into work. I had a nice office at home with book shelves lined from corner to corner of each wall to illustrate how my literacy and educational choices have contributed to my IQ, but that theory can be debunked quickly by tossing me ANY brain teasing puzzle ever invented. Eventually, someone will have to wipe the drool off my chin as I descend into the greater depths of stupidity trying to solve the idiotic puzzle. So, I took the office space, gave all the books away, sold the books shelves, desk and chairs and turned it into a toy room, not for me, for my grandkids. It was a great choice. The grandkids love it, so do I.
I have a doctor’s appointment this week, not because I am sick but because I changed doctors and now I have to meet him in person. He will undoubtedly go over my chart from my previous doctor. That chart will show that my cholesterol is slightly higher than normal, my blood pressure is slightly higher than normal and he will also see that I am overdue for a colonoscopy. I may have just discovered the reason for my fog…