Happy New Year!
Here is a recap of 2022 for you. I will try and hurry because I really would like to put it behind me and get busy on 2023!
In January, Truckers all over Canada created a Convoy to protest extended Covid lock down restrictions. They managed to get under the skin of their Prime Minister with exceptionally beautiful hair, causing him to state that because of the blockade convoy, his hair gels were not getting through and that was the last straw. He subsequently froze their bank accounts, seized their assets and had their trucks removed from city streets. And…I didn’t make any resolutions.
In February, I battled a cough, gave up, asked to see the doctor but was told I couldn’t see the doctor in person because I was sick. Per the doctors orders, I managed to put Bob, the MRI tech at risk by getting a scan of my chest. After a some tense days of review by the doctor, he managed to tell me that, the MRI was clear and that I just had a cough…
In March, Vladimir Putin invaded Ukraine for reasons that are still unclear. The United stated stepped up like the great people we are, and have sent the Ukrainians 100 billion dollars in aide with little to no oversight. Since the Republicans and Democrats were busy solving nothing, I volunteered my Casio calculator watch to help keep track of things but I haven’t heard anything back yet.
In April, I came out of the closet and admitted that I had a mullet in 1981. There are things we have all done that we aren’t proud of and the mullet was one of my weaker moments. Also in April, students were told they would have their student loans forgiven and as of the this writing, all that can be heard from the current administration in response to NOT making this happen has been a hearty… Nanny Nanny Boo Boo. I also filed for an extension on my taxes. More on that later…
In May, I had my first mothers day without my mother. It was a difficult thing to get my mind around and I don’t think I ever will. In order to take my mind off that, I made what I would consider a top notch wedding gift for a family friend. I will leave it at that, but I can tell you that I threw out my shoulder patting myself on the back. It was that awesome.
In June, I graduated from Sandpaper “Grit Scale” school and I have put my degree to use. You could look high and low and you’d find no rough boards in any of my works. June was also fathers day and I put down in words some of the best dad jokes ever told. You’ll have to go back and read them if you want to, but here is a teaser if you missed it, “why was 6 afraid of 7?”…”Because 7,8,9…
In July, I flirted with “cutting the chord” and getting rid of cable TV. I purchased, HULU, Netflix, Paramount +, Prime Video in preparation for the cut but kept the cable, so now I got to the bank once a quarter and refinance my cable bill.
In August, Nichelle Nichols, my boyhood crush passed away. She played Lt. Uhura on Star Trek. She was not just incredibly beautiful and incredibly talented, she was a pioneer for racial equality when she delivered the first interracial kiss on prime time TV. She was a gem and will be missed.
In September, Queen Elizabeth died. I was never enamored with the royal family but this lady was different, She was 96 and could still command the room. I think she should have spanked the grandkids a few more times because they seem a little ungrateful, especially the one with the red hair.
In October, I lost another high school friend. She was a beautiful soul and will be missed. The check engine light on my truck came on and oh yeah, I filed the tax return. Apparently, my children and grandchildren’s inheritance was more effectively utilized in Ukraine.
In November, we had the midterm elections and I brilliantly provided you with the “chop saw guide” to voting. It was chock full of advise on how to pick the worst candidates. The republican red wave turned out to be more of a violet colored ripple. Also in November we had Thanksgiving and ate a bunch of food which gave me the opportunity to gave thanks for being able to help Ukraine fund their war chest.
In December, Christmas came and went. The build up to Christmas is truly amazing, it begins shortly after St. Patricks day and ends 30 minutes after all the packages have been shredded. If you think about it, it is all very anticlimactic.
My year was interesting and I hope yours was too. There were some really good things that happened to me like; seeing Elton John with my daughter, I got a clean cancer scan, my youngest grandson went from crawling to running. He hasn’t walked yet, he runs EVERYWHERE, and my oldest grandson is now potty trained. Although, we are still working on shutting off the faucet properly and managing the “dribble” part of male relief. Oh, I bought another house to work on in my spare time and did I mention I paid my taxes?
Happy New Year everyone.